| in the headlines about the presidential election and the | | | | following steps: |
| stock market meltdown is the fact that October is | | | | 1. Insist that your partner participate in individual |
| the month dedicated to controlling domestic violence. | | | | therapy as well as relationship counseling with you. |
| The irony is that the financial shock waves are likely | | | | The individual therapy should focus on areas such as |
| to increase the prevalence of abuse. The economic | | | | anger management, cognitive behavioral change, |
| turmoil will undoubtedly lead to greater fears, | | | | insight, skill building, communication, stress reduction |
| pressure and anxiety within families facing financial | | | | and control strategies. |
| collapse - and, in many cases, that stress will lead to | | | | 2. Get help from friends and family members. Talk |
| battering. | | | | with them about your concerns and let them know |
| The Centers for Disease Control believes that 10% | | | | what you need from them. Educate yourself and |
| of the population is affected by domestic abuse, | | | | them about domestic violence. Tell them how to |
| although it is estimated that only one-third of these | | | | recognize that you or others may be in immediate |
| cases are actually reported. It is the most common | | | | danger and devise code words to inform them if you |
| cause of injury for women ages 15 to 44 who suffer | | | | need help. |
| physical as well as emotional injury, such as | | | | 3. Prepare to take care of yourself - emotionally, |
| depression, anxiety and social isolation. | | | | financially and physically. Find a therapist who will help |
| Why do women remain in abusive relationships? | | | | you develop self-confidence and the life skills you |
| Frequently, the reason is fear - they have been | | | | may need to go solo. Take charge of your personal |
| brainwashed by the perpetrator - convinced that | | | | finances, open your own bank account, find a job if |
| they are helpless and cannot cope alone. Or they're | | | | you are not already employed. |
| afraid that the abusive partner will harm them or their | | | | 4. Have an exit strategy and plan what to do if and |
| children if they attempt to leave. Another justification | | | | when you leave the relationship. Investigate available |
| is the victims' incorrect belief that the responsibility is | | | | community resources and learn about shelters in your |
| theirs, that they have caused the abuse or that it is | | | | area. Have copies of documents you may need as |
| up to them to stay in order to keep the family | | | | well as extra clothes and cash; leave them with a |
| together. Finally, because of a variety of | | | | friend or neighbor so you can retrieve them later. |
| psychological issues and complicated family dynamics, | | | | 5. Immediately let someone in authority know about |
| the defense mechanism of denial can remain strong. | | | | the abuse, if it occurs. Have the phone number of |
| Domestic abuse victims often refuse to see | | | | the local police station available - and you can always |
| themselves as battered and don't accept the fact | | | | call 911. If the violence is directed to your children or |
| that the perpetrator will continue the abusive | | | | the elderly, know how to contact the agencies |
| behavior. | | | | dealing with child welfare and elder abuse. |
| If you are afraid of your partner's anger and how he | | | | As we move through these difficult financial times, |
| she treats you, your children or elders under your | | | | the stresses we all face will be great. Emotions are |
| care, your first responsibility is to protect yourself | | | | likely to be close to the surface as uncertainty about |
| and loved ones from harm. Resolve to begin the | | | | the state of our economy continues. Be aware of |
| tough process of freeing yourself. You may feel | | | | any potential for domestic abuse in your family and |
| trapped and so deeply entrenched in the | | | | pledge to learn how to protect yourself and your |
| dysfunctional relationship that it seems you will never | | | | loved ones from the painful trauma caused by such |
| break away. You can make a start by taking the | | | | violence. |