The Cycle of Domestic Violence - Do We Want to Know?

It's enough to make the most indifferent ofhave the guy thrown in jail?
observers angry. Except like many of us the targetAs to the second question many domestic violence
of their anger is generally misplaced.victims believe rightly or wrongly that law
We see a woman who is a victim of domesticenforcement is powerless to do anything in these
violence and are upset that she has let herselftypes of situations. A number of jurisdictions are
become victimized.starting to take domestic violence quite seriously as
Of course saying she let herself is not exactlywell as getting tough with abusers.
correct but at this point many of us do not care. SheBut it was not always the case and in some parts of
got herself into this and refuses to get herself out.the country it remains so. Quite a few women are
Pretty soon this cold response gives way to outrighteyewitnesses to what happened to themselves and
blame. Maybe even trying to convince yourself thatother victims when police were called. Nothing. It is
she has got it coming.better to deal with the situation themselves rather
Or something like that. After all she has neverthan call the police and make the problem worse.
reported her spouse or boyfriend to the police. ThatAs to why she does not leave? Try fear and threats
has always been left to a third party. And when theof something worse than the physical assault. When
cops arrived what did she do? Tell them nothinggetting out of an abusive relationship the threat of
happened or take the blame herself. For crying outviolence may decrease over time but for the
loud the guy almost put her in the hospital and sheimmediate and foreseeable future many victims find
protects him like he's the epitome of innocence.themselves at greater risk.
At this juncture you might take the next step andThere is something else which those of us on the
attempt to convince yourself that she has got thisoutside looking in refuse to consider. And that is the
coming.untold psychological damage that has been done to
That is of course a ridiculous sentiment. She signedthe victim of domestic violence. When she does wind
up to love and build a strong positive relationship notup leaving that situation it tales a good deal of love,
to be physically assaulted. But the thinking follows asupport and protection for her to rebuild her life
certain pattern in our society. When in doubt blamethanks to the abuse she has suffered.
the victim.But for many of us all that would require the will to
The National Institute of Justice estimates that closeexplore past the preconceived ideas we have put in
to ninety five percent of all domestic violence victimsplace. For society in general it's about winners and
are women. That confirms what many of us alreadylosers. And not leaving a losing situation means the
knew but the Georgia Department of Humanvictim is more than likely a loser.
Resources brings into sharper focus by calculatingExcept they are not. They are individuals trapped in a
that every nine seconds somewhere in the Unitedviolent relationship that they never asked for. The
States a woman becomes the victim of domesticfact that domestic violence has been a long time
violence.epidemic means that as a society we are all losing.
Why doesn't she just leave or when the police arrive