| My recent divorce from a very abusive Narcissist has | | | | I deserved so much better treatment than what I |
| left me reflecting on how I survived that six and a | | | | was receiving from my husband. |
| half years. My abuser was verbally and emotionally as | | | | Each time an abuser devalues and demeans a victim, |
| well as psychologically abusive. The reason he | | | | something inside that victim dies just a little bit more. |
| stopped being physically abusive is because I made a | | | | Until there is nothing left of the victim's soul. |
| habit of dialing 911 whenever he became physically | | | | Narcissists really do rob you of your soul. They |
| threatening towards me. This worked for me. | | | | destroy it piece by piece and bit by bit until there is |
| All the books tell you the way to get away is to be | | | | just a black empty hole left inside the victim. When |
| passive and act like there is something wrong with | | | | the victim reaches that point she has nothing left to |
| yourself. This is suppose to make the Narcissist lose | | | | give or lose. |
| interest and move on. Nothing could be farther from | | | | That particular point is what I call the crucial turning |
| the truth. The more passive a victim is, the more | | | | point. That is when the fight or flight response kicks |
| abuse and devaluation she will receive. We won't | | | | in. Except fleeing is not a good option. They will find |
| even mention how that tactic also adds to her own | | | | you and con you into letting them back in your life |
| devaluation. How could a women possibly feel good | | | | again. Fighting is the only option the victim has at that |
| about lying down to take the abuse and then blaming | | | | point. She must fight with all the might she has, each |
| herself? The abuser does that enough without the | | | | and every time there is the slightest attack. When |
| victim joining him. | | | | the victim fights back the abuser is suprised and |
| The only way I found to get out was to fight back. I | | | | does not like that he can be attacked as well. He will |
| fought back hard and heavy with every ounce of my | | | | recoil. Exactly like the viper he is. The victim must not |
| being every single time. Sure, he devalued me, yes, | | | | let up and continue to keep him off guard. When she |
| he demeaned me, but did I believe him? Hell, No! I | | | | does make her break he will not stop her. He will be |
| knew no matter how much I loved him, I | | | | glad she is gone. That is exactly how I survived |
| emphatically did NOT deserve the way he treated | | | | Narcissistic abuse. |
| me. Something way down deep inside kept telling me | | | | |