| Roughly half of all marriages in the USA end in | | | | such as: |
| divorce. An increasing number of those marriage | | | | - Your ex will generally employ a lawyer to file the |
| separations involve a restraining order being filed at | | | | order for her (thus costing money and requiring that |
| the same time as the petition for divorce. | | | | she finds one sooner rather than later); |
| Unfortunately, if you're the one fighting a restraining | | | | - She has to attend an "ex parte" court session |
| order, it is viewed as a standard tactical maneuver | | | | where the initial (temporary) order is granted outside |
| by lawyers eager to gain the initial advantage for | | | | of your presence. An interesting summary of the |
| their client. | | | | type of abuse which leads to innocent fathers dealing |
| To understand why your ex-partner would consider | | | | with the repercussions of a restraining order, and |
| filing an order, and then try to convince a judge of | | | | having to win a custody battle, was published in 2008 |
| its merit, let's look at the benefits involved: | | | | by the American agency 'Respecting Accuracy in |
| - Your ex gets instant custody of the children; | | | | Domestic Abuse Reporting' (aka RADAR). Its report |
| - Alimony and maintenance payments increase; | | | | was titled 'Without Restraint: The Use and Abuse of |
| - The burden of proof is on YOU, not your ex. In | | | | Domestic Restraining Orders', and here was one of |
| many divorces, there is also an element of | | | | its citations: "A 1995 study conducted by the |
| manipulation and/or control which motivates your ex | | | | Massachusetts Trial Court... found that less than half |
| to file a complaint which results in a restriction against | | | | of the orders involved even an allegation of violence." |
| you. You're basically at risk of being arrested even if | | | | The same study goes on to quote a New Jersey |
| you pass by your ex in a shop at random, or call on | | | | attorney regarding the more specific motives behind |
| the phone, or even send a box of roses through the | | | | phony orders - specifically, that 40%-50% of all |
| mail. There's nothing you can do about this situation | | | | restraining orders are requested purely as a legal |
| until you can prove to a judge that the claim is | | | | maneuver. |
| baseless. It's all part of the divorce game. But, most | | | | Hundreds of thousands of people have a restraining |
| divorces aren't amicable, and this is just another | | | | order filed against them during the modern day |
| method to cause suffering to fathers when all forms | | | | American divorce. That's a lot of pain, and a lot of |
| of contact are taken away with their kids. | | | | phony restraining orders stopping fathers from seeing |
| Unfortunately, this harms the kids as much as the | | | | their children. But with so much to gain, it's no |
| father. Regardless of this factor, when we consider | | | | wonder more divorces involve the father handling an |
| the disadvantages of filing an order against their old | | | | order alongside the other stuff too. |
| partner, the list comes up with rather trivial matters, | | | | |