| It's been seven years since he/she has had contact | | | | parent and all others involved, remains a mystery to |
| with his/her child. And this child is turning 18 years old | | | | the child...even for the child who joins in on the |
| next year. Those forgotten longings and rights start | | | | alienation. On that 17th birthday they, too, are mindful |
| stirring again. | | | | of being months away from having their say. |
| I hear this story routinely and recognize a pattern in | | | | We see adolescents polluted with propaganda so |
| these parents who have been tossed aside as | | | | thick that you could hardly recognize the person |
| though they were tissue that no longer matters. The | | | | they're referring to when they speak of the alienated |
| fact is that they continue to matter long after they | | | | parent. And even these kids wonder, who/where is |
| have been cast away. | | | | my birth mother, or as the case may be, my birth |
| The Rekindled Longing for Your Stolen Child | | | | father? |
| There is something about that 17th birthday that | | | | It's only natural to want to know your natural parent, |
| starts the itch again. It's just so close to 18 and the | | | | whether estranged or not. Even children placed in the |
| clocks tick gets louder and louder. With each passing | | | | hands of an adopted parent at birth have longings to |
| day, your child is closer and closer to having his/her | | | | know who their natural parents are. |
| own say. | | | | It's a child's birthright to have contact with the people |
| The reality of that is much different than when this | | | | that inspired their life. And from the core of their |
| same child was 13 or even 15 years old. There's | | | | being, they know this. The longings they feel in this |
| realness to manifesting that possibility when you are | | | | regard make this critical window ripe for rekindling |
| counting months, rather than years. | | | | their relationship with you and yours with them. |
| You wake up and remember that three-year-old face | | | | The Choice of Parental Alienation or Not |
| and the sound of his/her voice. And you still can't | | | | This timely window offers both you and your child a |
| comprehend how you ended up with the empty stick | | | | choice. It's the choice to maintain or shatter the |
| on visitation after your divorce. None of it makes any | | | | parental alienation. It is the opportunity to satisfy |
| sense to you. In many respects, it's a faint nightmare | | | | those dormant longings and inevitable human rights |
| you have chosen to bury so you could go on with | | | | that you both have...no matter how either of you |
| paying your bills and maintaining order in your day. | | | | were cast away. |
| But none of this makes the longings go away...at | | | | If you are an alienated parent and wish to have |
| least not permanently. And the rights you have to | | | | contact with your natural soon-to-be adult child, see |
| know your flesh and blood remain in your DNA. | | | | this passage as a new beginning. Take in the fresh air |
| The Rekindled Longings for the Alienated Parent | | | | of it and find your way back for both of you. |
| The estranged parent, while alienated by the other | | | | |