My Boyfriend Wants More Space - What the Heck!

It happens to all of us at some point - just when wein a conversation or even via an online chat, ask if he
think everything in our relationship is going great, wehas time for the call or chat. Ask if there's a better
get a blindside heave ho. We ask, why? And thetime.
answer double blindsides us: Because he wants moreMaintain a positive space. When contact is resumed,
space. You say, Huh? My Boyfriend wants morekeep everything positive. No need to bring up any
space? What the heck? Is he for real?negatives. In fact, let him know, that you appreciate
Okay, let's dissect that. My boyfriend "wants morehis stance and his decision because it taught you a lot
space." What exactly does that mean? What is hisabout his needs as well as your own. Thank him for
"space"? How would I know if I was in his space sowhat he did. It will blow him away.
that I could get out of his space? What the heck?Let him close the space. Let him set the boundaries
You have to admit, this notion of "wanting space"for future contacts. By taking a passive approach to
can be a bit aggravating. Of course he should haveresuming contact with him, you are demonstrating
his space, just as we all need our space. So give it tothat you respect his need for space and that you
him.are not in any desperate state of need for his
If you still love your ex boyfriend, and you want tocontact. Both will work to your advantage.
get him back, then you certainly should give him hisChange his space. Actually, you'll want to change his
"space". And, while you are doing that, you can doperspective of space. That is, the further away you
some things that might influence his wholeremain, the less he will like his space. By staying low,
perspective so that, he'll miss having you in his space.maintaining your confidence and dignity, and
Keep your wits and your confidence about you. Yourespecting his space, his whole perspective of you will
know that it his loss more than it is yours. You maychange and, suddenly, his need for space will change.
still want him, but be willing to walk away with yourTruly, it's tough to tell what really goes on in their
head held high.minds when they say, "I want more space". Maybe
Follow the no contact rule. Even if you get somethey just want a break from the relationship. Maybe
slight signals that he may want to talk with you,you have become too clingy or in his face on some
avoid it. Stay away from contact for a while. It'sthings. What I have learned is that guys just want to
good to let things simmer while letting him knowbe understood. They want to be appreciated. And
you're going to do everything you can to "respect histhey want some empathy. If you can throw a pinch
space".of those things his way regularly, this "I need more
Learn his space. If any contact is made, demonstratespace" thing will likely go away forever. It's not
your new found respect for his space. Several timesalways as easy as that, however.