| A survivor asks, "Once your abusive partner has | | | | another person against your will. |
| used the legal system for further abuse, and final | | | | To learn how to do this, you need to seek the help |
| papers are filed with you having to see a | | | | of a psychologist that has expertise in family violence |
| psychologist of his choosing, what do you do? How | | | | and legal domestic abuse. This is not a task for |
| do you turn the case around? He continues to | | | | laymen, especially those who are being abused by |
| threaten to take the children away." | | | | spouses through divorce court. |
| When you are in this situation, it feels like something | | | | We have seen women coast-to-coast backed into |
| went "wrong." You ask yourself, "How is it that I'm | | | | psychological evaluations with a psychologist or |
| the victim/survivor and I'm having to defend myself | | | | psychiatrist of the abuser's choosing, after the final |
| and prove my mental/emotional stability." Right? | | | | papers are filed. And often with this, these women |
| If you are in this boat or headed down this road, you | | | | are officially directed into psychiatrics that invariably |
| will want to know everything you can about the | | | | compromise their mental health indefinitely. The |
| realities of domestic violence in divorce court. | | | | damage can disable them manifold for life. |
| Here are a few pointers to dealing with legal | | | | You must understand we are not simply talking about |
| psychiatric/psychological abuse (as I call it). | | | | a little mental health name-calling to jockey custody. |
| 1) You must work with a psychologist who is also an | | | | While it may appear to start as such, it doesn't stop |
| expert in domestic violence and the legal abuse | | | | here. We are talking about being forced into |
| syndrome. This person can help you prevent legal | | | | psychiatric remedies that have the potential to |
| psychiatric/psychological abuse described above from | | | | destroy your mental faculties, leaving you |
| becoming an option to harass and harm you. | | | | unemployable and potentially dysfunctional beyond |
| The general public, more often than not, assumes | | | | your imagination. |
| that psychologists are knowledgeable about domestic | | | | Real Life Legal Psychiatric Abuse |
| abuse. But, the fact is they are not trained in the | | | | For example, under the guise of a request for a |
| dynamics of intimate partner violence, much less the | | | | psychiatric evaluation, battered women in divorce |
| politics of domestic abuse in family court. The net | | | | court can be directed by the selected psychiatrist to |
| result is that they often become part of your | | | | undergo multiple rounds of involuntary |
| nightmare. | | | | electroconvulsive therapy and receive psychotropic |
| 2) You must realize that what you are being | | | | medications. |
| subjected to is NOT about you. Rather, it has more | | | | I hope you are listening carefully now. Many of these |
| to do with the agenda of your opposition. | | | | women are subjected to these extreme psychiatric |
| Your abusive partner has probably been telling you all | | | | remedies without having any prior diagnosis of any |
| along that: | | | | psychopathology. I have known some patients |
| -- there is no abuse, | | | | clinically for whom it took years to be released from |
| -- you're too sensitive, | | | | their in-patient confinement. |
| -- you have fabricated the whole thing, | | | | Now, I'm not saying it always progresses to this |
| -- you are the one with mental/behavioral defects | | | | extreme. But, it happens enough that it's something |
| ...and more... | | | | you want to be aware of... Further, you want to |
| So, you already know the drill. An abuser externalizes | | | | understand that this ploy is all in the effort to jockey |
| blame. That's right-you know this. He/she will insist | | | | custody, maintain control and discredit the abused. |
| that you are the problem. And because he/she needs | | | | When your ship is sinking, you do not have to drown. |
| to be right, the mission is on to prove you to be | | | | You do not have to throw out the baby with the |
| wrong. | | | | bath. You do not have to become the insane one. To |
| 3) You must do all that is humanly possible not to be | | | | the contrary, this is the time to rally your resources |
| subjected to surrendering your mental health to | | | | before the indelible damage is done. |