| Making the choice to divorce is a very difficult one. | | | | on your kids' needs. |
| The potential changes are enormous - living | | | | 2. Addiction. If you have a spouse who is abusing |
| arrangements, finances, relationships with mutual | | | | drugs and alcohol and refuses to look into treatment |
| family and friends, and your vision of your life | | | | or help of any kind, you and your children face chaos |
| undergo big changes. Of course, if there are children | | | | in the household and potential harm. You may face |
| involved, this can be the biggest consideration of all. | | | | legal and financial ramifications if your partner is |
| Many people hesitate at the thought of putting their | | | | getting DUI's or having accidents that result from |
| children through the process of divorce - yet there | | | | using. You are likely to be tempted to try to manage |
| are some situations that can be so destructive and | | | | the crises and be preoccupied with dealing with the |
| damaging that staying in the marriage might do more | | | | damage, and once again your children's needs may be |
| harm to the kids than leaving. Here are 3 scenarios | | | | difficult for you to focus properly upon. Your spouse |
| where it may be best for both the kids, as well as | | | | may even be a danger to the kids if he or she is |
| yourself, to consider leaving the destructive situation: | | | | using while responsible for parenting them. |
| 1. Abuse. If you are experiencing physical abuse, this | | | | 3. Chronic affairs. While you may try to hide details |
| is very dangerous and it often escalates. Please seek | | | | from them, they will be aware that something is |
| the professional guidance of a domestic violence | | | | wrong. Your level of emotional preoccupation with |
| counselor, such as may be found through a domestic | | | | the betrayals and ongoing hits to your self worth is |
| violence shelter, to construct a safe plan of exit. | | | | likely to be high. Without resolution, this ongoing |
| Emotional abuse can be less obvious to identify, but | | | | situation will expose the kids to a broken, non |
| is also extremely damaging. As a victim of abuse, you | | | | existent marriage, and there is a good chance they |
| are likely to be preoccupied with keeping the "peace" | | | | will discover the truth at some point. As with the |
| in the house and preventing incidents - yet they | | | | other damaging scenarios, there's a strong possibility |
| continue to occur. Your children are observing your | | | | that your kids will both take this model of marriage |
| interactions with your spouse as a prototype for | | | | as a prototype, as well as find you so distraught that |
| their own future relationships. In addition, your level | | | | being balanced and attentive to them will be very |
| of distraction over trying to keep the relationship | | | | difficult. |
| together is likely to keep you from focusing as much | | | | |