| It's true that nothing can prepare you for the role of | | | | their mothers. In a child's mind, fathers are strong and |
| fatherhood. Regardless of your age or whether or | | | | protective and even sometimes a bit scary. Just ask |
| not you have done it before, becoming a father is a | | | | any mother and she will tell you that when a child |
| momentous occasion and singularly unique. Just as | | | | gets in trouble, the first words out of their mouth will |
| each pregnancy, delivery and birth will be at least | | | | be "Please don't tell Dad", or something to that |
| slightly different from another, so will that moment in | | | | affect. Most children live in fear of their fathers much |
| time, or each moment in time, that you become a | | | | more so than their mothers, probably only because |
| father. | | | | Mom is around all the time and is therefore |
| It's true that most fathers kind of feel like they are | | | | somewhat predictable, where Dad, if he works |
| on the fringe; that they cannot possibly play a "key" | | | | outside the home, represents the unknown. You can |
| role in their children's lives. The truth is actually totally | | | | change that by being more involved and by being |
| opposite from this. Starting from the time they are | | | | consistent with your children, regardless of the |
| an infant, hearing your voice, feeling your arms, | | | | crappy day you had at work. Your children should |
| every single interaction between you and your son or | | | | have a healthy respect for you, but that should be |
| daughter, will be shaping their "idea" of you and more | | | | tempered with a healthy dose of love and knowing |
| importantly will be shaping them into the person they | | | | that if they need you, you will be there to help them |
| will someday become. You are so much more | | | | through difficult times. |
| important than you know. | | | | Finally, you and your partner are a team. Ideally, both |
| First, you are setting an example for your children in | | | | parents will live in the home, but in this day of easy |
| everything that you do. You get up in a good mood | | | | divorces, the truth may be that children come from a |
| and get the morning off to a good start-your children | | | | divided family. That doesn't mean they have to come |
| will notice. You go to work every day and work | | | | from a "broken" home. Just as you and your partner |
| honestly and hard, but yet make time for your | | | | should do everything possible to face your children |
| children, and they will notice. You help your partner in | | | | united, it shouldn't change if you decide to separate |
| both the nurturing and disciplining and your children will | | | | or divorce. This is the time when it will be more |
| follow your example. By the same token, those | | | | important than ever to present a united front-one |
| negative things that took place and were part of | | | | that is hell bent on doing the right thing for the |
| how "you were raised" will also turn out being | | | | children. Regardless of the fact that your failed |
| negatives to your children. Keep this in mind and be | | | | marriage may not be the fault of your children, it is |
| fully aware of those times that you sound particularly | | | | not so clearly evident to those young ones and they |
| like your Mom or Dad. If you can honestly remember | | | | need to be assured of their innocence at every |
| that same phrase or action with fondness or a smile | | | | opportunity. And do not use your children against |
| or as well-deserved, then you are probably on the | | | | your partner. They should be kept an innocent |
| right track. On the other hand, if you only have | | | | by-stander in this drama, which will no doubt be |
| negative feelings or experience anger when | | | | ongoing until things have settled down some, if ever. |
| remembering one of your parents saying or doing the | | | | Even if you or your partner choose to have a |
| same thing to you, then your child will probably see | | | | relationship with other people, the boxing gloves |
| and feel the same. It is true that "the crimes of the | | | | must come off in front of the children and for the |
| father are not the fault of the son", but in this case, | | | | sake of the children. |
| the father's actions can make all the difference in the | | | | Fatherhood is all about making the best decisions |
| future of the child. | | | | possible in order to shape your children's future. Enjoy |
| Secondly, children look up to their fathers for | | | | it and make the best of it. They are only young for |
| completely different reasons than they look up to | | | | such a short time. |