| "My ex has lured our son into wanting to live with | | | | thoughts,... for they have their own thoughts. You |
| him and now my son treats me just like my ex did. | | | | may house their bodies but not their souls,... for their |
| He has turned our boy against me." If you have left | | | | souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you |
| an abuser, you may know this one. | | | | cannot visit, not even in your dreams." |
| Sad to say, almost weekly someone writes to me | | | | They may come through you and your ex, but they |
| asking for insight on how to deal with this dilemma. | | | | did not come from either of you. And though they |
| How do you deal with being an estranged parent? | | | | are with you or your ex, they do not belong to |
| What can you do for your brainwashed child? | | | | either of you. Know this to be true! |
| Parental Alienation Advice | | | | See your child as his own person. And in his absence, |
| See your child as whole and do your best to feel | | | | feel him as whole and feel your own wholeness in |
| your wholeness in his (or her) presence. | | | | relation to him. |
| Even though you may know your boy is being | | | | The Healing Healthy Child |
| compromised by the polarization that he lives, trust in | | | | Trust in your child's capacity to mend the injuries |
| his innate capacity to individuate from his father's | | | | they have acquired along their path. Their healing, |
| control. Know that he can find himself and, from | | | | their growth, their development is theirs, not yours. |
| here, he may find you. | | | | While it is true, as their parent, you feel compelled to |
| You do not hold the clock on this one. It will happen | | | | influence their steps along the way to insure their |
| when it happens and most likely it will not be as a | | | | well-being; you do not and cannot own that |
| result of anything that you do. It will come about as | | | | process...for it is truly theirs. |
| a result of your child's evolution. | | | | If you hear indifference in this message, then your |
| (I can hear you thinking that he is evolving into an | | | | listening has gone astray. This is not about caring |
| abuser monster like his father.) Now... now, this may | | | | through control. This is about faith in that which |
| be true, but this road does not stop in his father's | | | | resides within your child's essence. And this faith can |
| home. Your boy's life will extend beyond that of his | | | | be yours whether or not you are in litigation. As you |
| father's influence. | | | | see him whole and feel your wholeness in his |
| The Whole Autonomous Child | | | | presence, both of you heal from parental alienation |
| As Kahlil Gibran said about children in The Prophet, | | | | and estrangement. |
| "You may give them your love, but not your | | | | |