| Could you become the next victim of abuse? | | | | woman could become a victim of domestic abuse. My |
| Domestic abuse does discriminate in age or gender. | | | | observation has been that women who suffer from |
| Like so many women I did not believe that it could | | | | low self-esteem are more likely to accept any type |
| happen to me. I thought my education and | | | | of behavior from their partners in order to maintain |
| background would save me from domestic abuse. I | | | | the relationship. I spoke with an older woman who |
| was wrong however. In my book "Be Careful Who | | | | was experiencing psychological abuse from her |
| You Marry" I recount the domestic abuse I endured | | | | boyfriend. When I asked why she stayed in the |
| in my marriage. In hindsight all the signs were there | | | | relationship she said that she was too old to find |
| that I could be the next victim of domestic abuse. | | | | someone else and that she accepts his mistreatment |
| From my experience and through observing other | | | | because she didn't want to be alone. I have found |
| domestic abuse relationships some women are | | | | that it is much better to be alone or feel loneliness |
| predisposed to experiencing domestic abuse in their | | | | than to be victimized by abuse of any form. |
| relationships during there life time. | | | | People pleasers have a way of contributing to being |
| The first place to look for the signs that a woman | | | | abused. In my childhood I never really rebelled. I |
| could be abused would be to look at the family | | | | would do anything my mother said for fear of |
| history. Children that grow up in an abusive home are | | | | making her angry. All I ever wanted to do was |
| more likely to be abused or be abusers. Personally, | | | | please her. As I became older and as my mother |
| my mother experienced domestic abused and so did | | | | would try to control my choices in life I felt the need |
| my grandmother. I vowed never to let a man put his | | | | to be in a relationship to get away from my mother. |
| hands on me, but I didn't vow to never let a man | | | | Relationships were my escape from the control I |
| manipulate me psychologically, abuse me verbally, or | | | | was feeling at home. In relationships I could do |
| abuse me mentally. Though some would not define | | | | anything I wanted, until I met my ex-husband. One |
| this behavior as domestic abuse the damage it | | | | of the reasons I stayed in the relationship longer than |
| causes is often greater than physical abuse. Anyone | | | | I should was because I was comfortable with |
| experiencing or has experienced this knows that | | | | pleasing and being controlled. I didn't realize that I |
| mental and verbal abuse can cause low self-esteem | | | | was contributing to my own abuse in this way until I |
| and is the precursor to physical abuse. I was | | | | left the relationship. I never wanted to make my |
| fortunate enough to leave my marriage before I | | | | ex-husband angry so I did whatever he asked me to |
| suffered at the hand of my ex-husband. I saw the | | | | do for fear of being verbally abused. I had repeated |
| signs that physical abuse would happen and got out | | | | the pattern that I learned all of my life. |
| of the relationship as the mental and verbal abuse | | | | Although these are indicators that a woman could be |
| became progressively worse. The best thing I did | | | | abused physically, mentally, or verbally it does not |
| was leaving the relationship before I hit or even killed. | | | | indicate that abuse will happen. |
| Low self-esteem is another factor in determining if a | | | | |