Breaking Out of the Circle of Abuse

This week a couple of women have asked me: "Iswhatever visions you once held for yourself.
there any point in trying to move on, when I am stillBut does that have to stop you taking one step
stuck in the relationship?"forward and then another, and another?
It's not hard to understand where they are comingWhen you do so, you will start to find your way
from. When a relationship has left you feeling utterlythrough that smokescreen of negativity. You will
drained and powerless, just dragging yourself throughstart to see some of what lies ahead for you.
your 'normal' day can be hard enough.Certainly, the process is scary. Because he has done
So how can you possibly hope to find the strengthhis work well so that you continue to hear the old
to take on all the challenges that ending thedestructive soundtrack still running through your head.
relationship will bring? How will you face up to theYou can't drown it out. It's one of the things that
enormous concerns you have on all possible fronts?most women try and fail. Nobody has ever told them
I remember that time in my life well. I remember thethat it's a counter-productive measure. Challenging his
questions I asked myself obsessively about a futurerubbishing of you only keeps it in the forefront of
without him. There were no good answers, only ayour mind.
paralysing fear, and the corrosive hope that maybe,So you can't drown it out. But you can replace it. You
just maybe, it could still work out...replace it when you start to create your own
That whole cycle is as destructive as it is normal -soundtrack that describes you the way you truly are
under the circumstances. It is the abused woman'sand truly can be. Even if you don't feel like that
equivalent of pedalling frantically on a hamster wheelperson at all right now.
and ending up exactly where you started, onlyYou know you were once a pretty good human
increasingly tired and worn. Hamsters may thrive onbeing with a lot to recommend you. Well, that never
that kind of workout; human beings do not.dies. His words may submerge it, but they can't
All verbal and emotional abuse is brainwashing. Anddestroy it. That person is still there, albeit dormant.
you cannot overcome that brainwashing withoutChanging your soundtrack will bring her back to life.
recognising it for what it is.Can you do that when you don't believe it? Yes, you
All abusers 'reprogram' their victims. By dint ofcan. Did you believe all the negative things he said
constant repetition, they make their partners feelabout you the first time he said them? Did you even
stupid, ugly, fat, powerless, unlovable, pathetic. Evenbelieve that he meant them? Or did he drum them
if friends and family are telling them a different story,into your mind by saying them again and again and
the abuser's words are powerful enough to put themagain?
into a negative 'trance', so that all they register isYou will believe almost anything you tell yourself
negatives.often enough, whenever you start. So why not start
So how and when do you break out?sooner, rather than later?
Thinking about breaking out is actually the firstYour recovery starts the moment you make that
tentative step. Many women stop there, orchoice, whatever the external circumstances. Your
backtrack, because they can't see where they arethinking, more than anything else gives you the
going. That's to be expected when you've beenpower to change your circumstances, get out of
brainwashed; it's perfectly normal.that relationship and rebuild your life.
Yet, the thought persists that there can be, must be,My ebook "The Woman You Want To Be" gives you
something better out there for you - which therethe words and the structure to support that choice
undoubtedly is.and keep you moving forward, step by step, along
Do you really have to see it, before you can pursuethe path of recovery.
it? Because that is the Catch 22. Your abusiveThere can be no better time to embark on your
partner has erected a smokescreen of negativity inrecovery than right now.
front of your eyes so that have lost sight of