Abusive Relationship - 7 Tips to Help Your Loved One in an Abusive Relationship

We often hear friend's and family members ofwhere you want them to be.
domestic abuse victims express frustration over their2) Allow whatever and where ever they are to have
loved one's choosing to remain in their abusivea voice that is authentically their own voice.
relationships. This is understandable. Question is how3) Suspend judgment of your loved one's choices
can they help the abused?regardless of whether these very choices would or
In working with families over the years, I find thewouldn't be yours.
best thing to remind them of is the importance of4) Maintain this atmosphere of permission and
helping the abused build the intra-psychicacceptance, while providing as much information as
infrastructure to carry on beyond the abusivepossible to educate and inform about domestic
relationship.violence resources.
What Is Intra-psychic Infrastructure?5) Help your loved one hear their own inner voice by
Intra-psychic infrastructure is the mental anddirecting attention to their personal feelings and
emotional self-sufficiency that is necessary to seefeeling states.
and believe in oneself beyond the abusive relationship.6) Be an unwavering source of support to encourage
It is the "soft" more intangible element that supportsthis person hearing and being themselves.
breaking the cycle of abuse. It is the7) Trust no one wants to hurt, nor do they genuinely
psycho-social-emotional piece often left out when webelieve they deserve to be abused.
address the question of, why doesn't she/he justBONUS TIP... Acknowledge and celebrate every step
leave?toward self-sufficiency and self-honoring no matter
How You Can Help Your Loved One Buildhow small or inconsequential it may seem. Each step
Intra-psychic Infrastructure?one takes toward self-respect is a step away from
1) Always meet someone where they are, NOTthose who fail to provide the same regard.