| Does your once happy marriage seem to be falling | | | | never have one partner taking control over the |
| apart? No matter what you do, nothing seems to be | | | | other. It never works. |
| helping? Many couples struggle with this problem. The | | | | It is also not acceptable for one spouse to abuse the |
| good news is that most of these couples are able to | | | | other, either physically or mentally. Abuse is abuse, |
| solve their marital problems, and go on to have a | | | | and it is best that you get out of that situation as |
| happy marriage again. Here are three ways to do | | | | soon as possible. You do NOT have to live that way! |
| just that. | | | | You are a good person, and you deserve better. |
| 1. You don't have to win every argument. | | | | Even in an abusive relationship, however, the abuser |
| Since marriages are a union of two people, | | | | can get help, and you can have a happy marriage |
| arguments happen. Two people, no matter how | | | | again. If the abuse is a result of an alcohol or drug |
| much they love each other, simply cannot agree all | | | | addiction, your spouse can get help for that, too. |
| of the time. If you are the spouse who has to win | | | | Once the addiction is gone, the abuse usually goes |
| every argument, take a step back. Some things can | | | | out the door with it. |
| be let go. Everyone has their own opinion of things | | | | 3. The two of you have made a commitment to |
| and situations. What you may see as 'right', your | | | | each other - keep it! |
| spouse may see as 'wrong'. | | | | Remember back to the day you got married. The |
| Sometimes there is no right or wrong, only a | | | | two of you vowed to spend the rest of your lives |
| different way of thinking. When you learn to see | | | | together. You committed yourselves to each other, |
| things through your spouses eyes, you will find that | | | | through thick and thin. If you find that your marriage |
| you are having less and less arguments. The 'need' to | | | | isn't what you want it to be, then it is up to you to |
| win an argument will cease, because you know that | | | | find out why and to fix it. When you want to know |
| you both can be right about different things. When | | | | how to fix a broken marriage, it is best that you and |
| you are able to see this, then most of your | | | | your spouse work together. If only you want to fix |
| arguments will be cut short, leaving most of the | | | | it, you can still save your marriage. |
| damaging words left unspoken. | | | | When you learn to see things through your spouse's |
| 2. Every successful relationship has limits. | | | | eyes, and understand that you or your spouse can't |
| Just as families set 'house rules' with their kids, there | | | | always be right, you will soon see your marriage start |
| should be 'house rules' in your marriage. There are | | | | to change for the better. When you set 'ground rules' |
| things that are acceptable in marriages, and then | | | | in your marriage, then lines won't be crossed. You will |
| there are things that are not. Let me explain... It is ok | | | | both know the other's limits, and will work on not |
| when the two of you may not agree, but can come | | | | pushing those limits. |
| up with a way to compromise. | | | | These steps will keep most arguments at bay, and |
| It is NOT ok for you to have a disagreement, and | | | | will decrease the seriousness of the ones that occur. |
| then fight about it until one of you gives in. All this will | | | | Fixing a broken marriage isn't that hard to do, but |
| do is to make one spouse have power over the | | | | you have to decide that you really want to. If you |
| other, and results in an ongoing power struggle. You | | | | go into it half-heartedly, you will get half-hearted |
| are in a marriage, not a tug-of-war! the two of you | | | | results. |
| are equals - you are in a partnership. Partnerships | | | | |